♕ TWENTIETH COMMAND | VIDEO

[sadisticwarfare]

This is getting ridiculous.

[Well that certainly sounds like Archer, though he's not on screen. The background appears to be a very boring room in what looks like a hotel, with a window showing that it is indeed still raining dogs. Apparently it was fine while it was raining cats, but Archer has finally lost his suspension of disbelief at the dogs.]

Does anyone have any idea why this is happening? I was willing to write the sharks off as a freak storm, but this? It's been two days of this now. How long is it going to rain animals?

[The camera turns then to focus on two Espurrs sitting on the hotel bed. They look as traumatized as any normal Espurr, but they're sitting upright and clutching each other's paws for dear life.]

I have another question. Has anyone ever had a Pokémon that has simply refused to do anything without being accompanied by a partner?

[Archer moves into the shot, proving that he's not actually filming this. He reaches out and scoops up the Espurr on the left, pulling it away from the second one. Immediately both the cats start wailing. It's very loud and the both of them immediately attempt to reunite, the one on the bed clawing at Archer's uniform and the one in his arms squirming frantically. Archer sighs and drops the cat on the bed and the two quickly join hands again and go silent, staring up at Archer like he's committed the worst sin possible.]

I can't get them to do anything. I didn't even want two, but when I caught the first one the second one wouldn't stop following me and crying.

[He sounds annoyed, but it was really just kind of depressing.]

I've never had two Pokémon this dependent on each other. Has anyone else had experience dealing with something like this?

Comments

[ossifragant]

[Greed's surprised that he didn't pick up on it until Archer accidentally let it slip in August. It's obvious, now that he knows.]

He can be a hard guy to read sometimes. It's difficult to tell what's on his mind.

It's only a couple months until one of those strange weekends is supposed to happen again, right? I'm sure he'll be here.

[sadisticwarfare]

He should be. I'll be mad if he isn't.

[Archer seems to have relaxed a bit though. He's back to smirking again, at any rate.]

The last time he showed up he ended up playing that knife game with Kimblee. I really should have figured for them bonding over something so stupid and potentially dangerous.

[ossifragant]

[That mental image gets him to smile. It's not distant or sad, so that's something.]

And here I was wondering if they would kill each other if they ever met. Of course they'd bond over something like that.

[sadisticwarfare]

I can't say I'm surprised, though I am surprised no one ended up losing a finger.

[He's also kind of surprised Kimblee didn't take the opportunity to kill Kimbley, since that is what Archer had ordered him to do.

...Look, it's a long, really dumb story, let's not get into that.]

[ossifragant]

Lucky them, I guess.

[....Does this have to do with that thing that Kimblee refused to tell him anything about.]

[sadisticwarfare]

I don't even know how they met and decided that was a good idea.

[...Probably.]

[ossifragant]

....knowing them it was probably an idea they both came to at the same time. Or one suggested it to the other.

[sadisticwarfare]

...That does sound like something they'd do.

[The things he has to put up with...]

Kimblee wasn't too pleased with our Kimbley's mullet. Apparently I failed to mention that to him.

[ossifragant]

[That gets him to laugh.]

I'll refrain from letting him know whose handiwork that was.

[sadisticwarfare]

So that was your doing? He refused to cut it all to one length which was a never-ending source of frustration for me.

[ossifragant]

[And Kimbley still has the haircut three years later.

This is pretty much a victory as far as Greed's concerned.]

He wouldn't let me cut it off either. Hence the haircut he ended up with.

[sadisticwarfare]

He's such a pain...

[Archer still looks pleased though.]

Maybe he'll cut it once he gets here permanently, or maybe he'll let it grow out. Either way would be better than that hideous mullet.

[...He kind of likes the mullet, okay.]

[ossifragant]

[Kimbley with short hair is somehow more ridiculous than Kimbley with a mullet.]

I'm still surprised he wanted to keep his hair long. You'd think after so much time he'd want it all cut off.

Do you think he'll remember everything when he's here permanently?

[sadisticwarfare]

...I don't know. I'm not sure something like this has ever happened before. He's learned a lot about this place and he's been here for several of those strange weekends, but I don't know what will happen when he arrives here permanently.

[ossifragant]

...Starting over wouldn't be so bad, I guess. I'd tell him what I told you. That I'm not looking for revenge.

[sadisticwarfare]

[Starting over would be bad. Archer's changed a lot in three years - Kimbley has told him that much repeatedly. The changes aren't so much that he'd be unrecognizable, but they certainly would make things difficult, wouldn't they?]

...I doubt he'd have any interest in betraying you again. There's nothing to get out of it here.

[YOU'RE NOT HELPING, ARCHER]

[ossifragant]

[Archer, you're codependent as fuck. He's kind of worried Kimbley would run the fuck away from you but he's not going to say that.]

The only thing betraying me did was ensure he didn't die on the floor of a safehouse.

You both missed the forest for the trees taking me out.

[sadisticwarfare]

[Yeah, that is a big cause for concern.]

The intention wasn't to take you out--

Ah, but I suppose it doesn't matter now.

[LET'S NOT GET INTO THAT.]

[ossifragant]

[How to say "you're the cats" so it comes across as helpful and not like he's trying to be a dick...

But that makes him pause and stare at the screen for a moment.]

...was he upset? When I died?

[sadisticwarfare]

...We didn't agree on what happened. He wasn't told that I was going to have all the chimeras killed.

[Admittedly that was sort of a last minute decision once he found out about Tucker, and he's never made a mistake quite that awful. Assuming that Tucker was capable of such advanced transmutations was definitely not one of his brightest moments.]

We never talked about your death.

[It was just something that never came up.]

[ossifragant]

...they all liked him, you know. Except for Martel. I cared about them both very deeply so I ignored it when she would pick a fight.

[sadisticwarfare]

[...]

I'm sorry about what happened.

[Mostly because things would have gone a lot easier for him had he managed to get the chimeras on his side, but he's trying.]

Maybe some of them will show up here.

[He really hopes they don't.]

[ossifragant]

And have them try and kill you and Kimblee?

...as much as I care about them, it's best if none of them show up here.

I know you don't consider me a friend, but I don't make the distinction between "friend" and "ally." I'd rather not see you hurt.

[sadisticwarfare]

[Greed, that was actually really sweet and it's obvious Archer has no idea what to do with that.]

Kimblee can handle himself.

[...Wait.]

Kimblee and I can handle ourselves. There's no need to worry about that.

[ossifragant]

[You're one of his people for god know's what reason.

Kimblee wouldn't get this sentiment expressed so congratulations!]

You probably could if you encountered them without their powers or weapons.

[He does, however, raise a brow at Archer needing to correct himself.]