♕ NINETEENTH COMMAND | AUDIO / PRIVATE TEXT TO KIMBLEE & COBRA | REINTRO

[sadisticwarfare]

[ AUDIO ]

--what do you mean you have no idea how this happened!?

[Oh look, it sounds like Archer's in the middle of shrieking at someone. Isn't this the best way to let everyone know he's alive and well and back in Johto again?]

No, I don't particularly care that you're not the one responsible for it; someone needs to take the fall for this!

[The post is audio only so it's impossible to tell just who Archer is yelling at. The man that answers sounds like a generic NPC and it's difficult to make out what he's saying since Archer just interrupts him again and continues on loudly.]

This is the second time this has happened and I demand an explanation!

[A sudden clattering sound obscures anything else he says and for a moment there's dead silence.]

...Have you been recording this?

[More silence. Then there are footsteps that sound like they're approaching the 'Gear and abruptly the feed shuts off.]

[ TEXT - PRIVATE TO KIMBLEE & COBRA ]

[An hour later Archer sends out two identical private texts to Kimblee and Cobra, since they're the only two people in Johto he really cares about.]

My apologies for suddenly disappearing like that. I understand it must have been inconvenient. I am back in Goldenrod and expect to hear from you soon. I would like to know what has happened in my absence.

Comments

[text/private]

[explosivecombat]

[...Ah. Well, that's...

Ah.]

"Inconvenient" is something of an understatement, though it isn't anything requiring an apology. Of course, I'll accept it regardless, but that's really neither here nor there.

[text/private]

[sadisticwarfare]

Of course it's an understatement.

[Just look at that ego.]

How have you been?

[And look at this stilted attempt at a conversation, even over text! It takes serious skill to fail this hard.]

[text/private]

[explosivecombat]

[You tried. As much as he wishes this weren't genuine trying, because wow, that's actually a little sad.]

I can't complain, at any rate.

Am I to assume that you don't recall much happening back in your own world, or have circumstances changed?

[text/private]

[sadisticwarfare]

I don't remember anything new, so I believe it's safe to say that nothing has changed.

[But then again maybe the automail was so horrible he completely blocked it from his memory and really, who would blame him?]

[text/private]

[explosivecombat]

It would probably be obvious otherwise, if those three-day periods are anything to judge by; your personality took a bit of a shift due to the situation. At the same time, I imagine there to be no harm in asking.

[KIMBLEE...]

[text/private]

[sadisticwarfare]

Did it really?

[No, really, this is news.]

I don't have the automail at all if that's what you're asking.

[text/private]

[explosivecombat]

Oh, yes. It was rather disconcerting, really.

As it stands, I doubted this place would bring you here with all of that intact; that was likewise rather disconcerting, though for different reasons.

[text/private]

[sadisticwarfare]

How was I different?

I seriously doubt the automail would be allowed since weapons aren't brought in here, but as I said, I don't remember any of that so I don't believe there's any reason for concern.

[text/private]

[explosivecombat]

That hardly matters now, does it?

I believe you wanted to know how things went in your absence...? I imagine you'll be equal parts devastated and relieved to know that everything didn't immediately fall apart without you; the Commander was perhaps surprisingly good to me, though he was his usual level of...well, himself at certain points. There was a swarm of some hideous sentient slime-things that no one has been identify yet, and as of last night we've been invited to some party being thrown by some rather important people in the region - I believe it's another instance of that event the Elite Four hosted last year.

[text/private]

[sadisticwarfare]

[You are the least helpful person, Kimblee... But fine, he'll let it go for now.]

I'm pleased to hear that Cobra was good to you. What more can you tell me about the swarm and this party?

[text/private]

[explosivecombat]

Next to nothing, unfortunately - the sentient slime seems benevolent enough, if a bit confusing, in that way that most of the creatures here seem to be. I don't own one simply because you couldn't pay me enough to do so.

The party is formal, dates are encouraged. It's possible we'll get to speak to the Elite Four in question - but from what I've heard about last year, it's doubtful. I have no idea what a prom is, but apparently that's what it's being called.

[private text]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Inconvenient is certainly one way to put it, but since it's beyond your control, there's no need to apologize for it. And I'm glad to hear that you've returned.

[Okay, that's not even remotely how he'd act if this was one of his minions, but since he actually likes Archer, he gets a pass, instead of some weird attempt by Cobra to outshriek the shrieking that Archer originally broadcast.]

[private text]

[sadisticwarfare]

[...We don't discuss the shrieking.]

I'm pleased to see you're still here. I take it Kimblee wasn't too difficult to handle?

[Because clearly Kimblee is his responsibility.]

[private text]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

No, he was no trouble at all.

[Aside from declaring war on Olivine at one point. There was that.]

Were you expecting him to be a problem?

[private text]

[sadisticwarfare]

No, of course not. I just wanted to make sure he treated you with the amount of respect you deserve, Commander.

[SURPRISINGLY THAT'S NOT SARCASM...]

[private text]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

If he hadn't, I would've been incredibly surprised.

[But enough about that.]

And as to what happened in your absence, a number of unimportant things. Most importantly the same ridiculous gathering from last year seems to be going on again. Having attended before, I would suggest going as a means to gather information and scouting potential targets. That's about all these things are good for anyway.

[He'd mention the weird unclassifiable Pokemon, but he sort of lost interest in those already. Therefore, they're unimportant!]

[private text]

[sadisticwarfare]

That's being held again this year? I suppose it would be best to attend...

[But he hates social gatherings!]

Do you intend to go again this year, Commander?

[private text]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Of course. Much as I dislike these things, it's an excellent opportunity to keep a closer eye on my enemies while they can't do anything to me. I'd be a fool to pass on that opportunity.

[private text]

[sadisticwarfare]

I suppose I'll see you there, then, if not at some point before.

[...But what will Cobra wear? This is clearly a pressing question.]

[private text]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[The mandatory formal wear and...something over his face. He's still weighing his options there.]

Yes, I imagine you will. After all, I'm hardly difficult to find. Except for my enemies, of course.

[private text]

[sadisticwarfare]

Of course. Thank you for looking after Kimblee while I was gone.

[video]

[exeggutorhead]

[Well, look who's back again. Envy certainly recognizes that voice.]

This place does give you a lot of trouble about that, doesn't it?

[video]

[sadisticwarfare]

[When Archer replies with video he seems a good deal calmer. He's trying, at least.]

It certainly does. It's almost as though someone doesn't want me here.

[video]

[exeggutorhead]

[Gold star, Archer. Envy grins.]

Well, if that's true then they don't do a very good job keeping you out.

[Translated from Envy-speak, it's 'good to have you back'.]

[Rocket-locked video]

[artfuldestruction]

Welcome, Colonel. If I didn't know better, I'd say you were pleasantly excited to be back.

[It's pretty subtle, really.]

Frankly, I find your enthusiasm inspiring.